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Khadijah Farmer doesn't wear makeup, has close-cut hair and wears men's business clothing, so she understands when she is frequently mistaken for a man. What she refuses to tolerate is being thrown out of a Manhattan restaurant for using the women's bathroom.
That's what happened to Farmer on June 24 when she, her girlfriend and another friend went to the Caliente Cab Company to eat after attending New York's Gay Pride Parade. A male bouncer followed her into the women's room, banged on the stall door and, when she came out, refused to look at her identification and demanded that she and her friends leave.
"I was in there maybe a minute" when the bouncer came in, she told TODAY co-host Meredith Vieira on Thursday.
"I replied from inside the stall, and I told him that I'm a woman and I’m supposed to be here," she said. "I could see him through the crack in the stall door — that was really frightening. When I came out of the stall, I attempted to show him my identification to prove that I was in the right bathroom."
The bouncer, she said, refused to look at the proof of her identity and gender. Instead, he took her upstairs to the seating area, made her party pay for the appetizers they'd already eaten, and showed them the door.
"Needless to say, that night was incredibly embarrassing and quite humiliating," Farmer, a counselor for people with disabilities, said. "I didn't do anything except go to the bathroom."
Farmer says she called the restaurant manager the next day to complain about the way she was treated, and was offered a free meal.
She wanted the management to assure her that it would train the staff to deal with people who express their gender in unconventional ways, but said that she was ignored.
With the help of the Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund, Inc. of New York City, she filed suit against the Caliente Cab Company.
Full Sotry |
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